please can someone do me the huge favor to spell check this email need to send dean of university important!?

Question

Hi Mr. Robertson my name is *********. I was enrolled in Miami Dade College I decided to transfer to Florida International University. I went to the office and explained to them that I have recently received my work permit (1-12-11),Residency card (3-22-2011) and License,vehicle registration (2-14-2011). I was told to bring my marriage certificate and my wife's passport,voter registration and W2 form. They led me to believe that everything was fine (I turned in all of my wife's documents) and after I put the deposit they told me I would be charged out of state, I was never charged out of state fee in Miami Dade College. I then spoke to someone else and told them that the student helping me for weeks never informed me of this and they responded by saying (it was not the students problem to inform me of that). I believed her response to be rude and I figured the student working there would be responsible to tell me this before I put a deposit, I was led to believe once I turned in my wife's documents I would be able to pick my classes and be charged in state. I need to start classes this semester and it is too late to go back to Miami Dade College because there classes already started and I already put a deposit in FIU. I need to start FIU this semester with in state tuition (I can't afford to pay out of state). I have lived in Miami all my life and have my temporary residency card and all documents).
*I have high school transcripts that indicate that I have attended Dr.Michael Krop for four years.
*I have bank statement (that I actively use) with my wife for over a year.
*I am in the records to have attended Highland Oaks Middle and Ojus in Miami.
*I would have my permanent residency this February for over a year.
*I received all my immigration Torches (that I am approved). I have my work permit since (1-12-11), Residency card (3-22-2011), Driver License(2-14-2011) and Vehicle Registration u (2-14-2011).
*

I decided to contact you because I feel you would have the power to help me. I have been in Deans list in MDC and I just want to be an addition to the team at FIU. Thank you so much.

Answer 1

The structure of the communication is important. I made changes to make a brief summary at the beginning, provide additional facts and info in the middle, request specific help at the end.



Mr. Robertson

I have decided to transfer to Florida International University. I was previously enrolled at Miami Dade College.

My problem is that after I made my deposit at FIU, the person in the office told me I would be charged out of state tuition. I was never charged out-of-state fees at Miami Dade College. Can you please help me.

I have lived in Miami all my life and have my temporary residency card and all documents:

High school transcripts that indicate that I have attended Dr.Michael Krop H.S. for four years. (I also attended Highland Oaks Middle and Ojus in Miami, and I believe they have my records.)

Bank statement (that I actively use) with my wife for over a year.

*I would have my permanent residency this February for over a year.

*I received all my immigration Torches (that I am approved). I have my work permit since (1-12-11), Residency card (3-22-2011), Driver License(2-14-2011) and Vehicle Registration (2-14-2011).

When I first went to the office to begin the enrollment process, I explained to them that I have recently received those documents. I was told to bring my marriage certificate, and my wife's passport, voter registration and W2 form. When I turned in all of my wife's documents, the people in the office led me to believe that everything was fine.

I believe you can understand my surprise at being informed that I would have to pay out-of-state tuition.

I believe I should have been told this this before I paid the deposit. I was led to believe once I turned in my wife's documents I would be able to pick my classes and be charged regular tuition.

I have been on the Deans list at MDC. I hope to be an active contributor in my classes here at FIU.

I need to start classes this semester, and it is too late to go back to Miami Dade College because classes there have already started. I have paid a deposit at FIU. I need to start FIU this semester with in-state tuition; I can't afford to pay out of state rates.

I would really appreciate your help, Mr. Robertson

Thank You.

**Full Name**

Student ID number if you have one, or receipt number on your deposit form.



end here ----------------------------



Skip this part about someone being rude, or who’s responsible. Keep the focus on solving the one problem you now face: getting classes at in-state fees.





Best Wishes

Answer 2

Dear Mr. Robertson,

I was enrolled in Miami Dade College , but I decided to transfer to Florida International University. I went to the office and explained to them that I have recently received my work permit (1-12-11),Residency card (3-22-2011) ,license and vehicle registration (2-14-2011). I was told to bring my marriage certificate and my wife's passport,voter registration card and W2 form. They led me to believe that everything was fine (I turned in all of my wife's documents) . However,after I made the deposit, they told me I would be charged an out of state fee, I was never charged an out of state fee in Miami Dade College. I then spoke to someone else and told them that the student helping me for weeks, never informed me of this . They responded by saying it was not the students problem to inform me of that I believed her response to be rude and I figured the student working there would be responsible to tell me this before I put in a deposit, I was led to believe once I turned in my wife's documents, I would be able to pick my classes and be charged in state. I need to start classes this semester . It is too late to go back to Miami Dade College because there classes already started . I need to start FIU this semester with in state tuition (I can't afford to pay out of state). I have lived in Miami all my life and have my temporary residency card and all documents).

-I have high school transcripts that indicate that I have attended Dr.Michael Krop for four years.

- I have a bank statement ,that I actively use,) with my wife for the past year

.- I am in the records to have attended Highland Oaks Middle and Ojus in Miami.

- I would have my permanent residency this February/2012 , for over a year.

- I received all my immigration Torches .





I decided to contact you because I feel you would have the power to help me. I have been on the Dean's list in MDC and I just want to be an addition to the team at FIU.



Thank you so much



name ....................................









It wasn't the tutor's job to tell you everything. Hopefully the letter to whom the letter is going , will be able to help.



I would leave out the part about the registrar being rude. She is part of the team.



I took out some repetition..

Answer 3

If this would be a buisiness type e mail, then your grammar and spelling portray who you're, what your characyter is like, and what your paintings ethics are. If it is an e mail to a family member, you decide on the grammar and spelling to be respectable, simply by fact if this is sloppy, the family member would desire to anticipate which you rushed interior the path of the e mail, did no longer think of it out, and don't care sufficient for them to make the attempt to deliver an excellent, heat e mail. If it is to a buddy, this is alright to decrease to rubble slightly as long as they are able to appreciate it. remember that there is often SpellCheck and employing undesirable grammar could make you look much less knowledgeable than you relatively are.

Answer 4

Your good!!